I know in my last post I talked about how I feel Bella around, but this time I SAW her... {Chills}

Austin hasnt been sleeping well and has started screaming when I lay him down even tho he will be in a deep sleep. So weird. Anyway, I normally pick him back up and walk, sing to him, rock him..and try again. Well about the fourth time of doing this I started to get a little tired of it. Eh well..I was just tired really. Or REALLY TIRED. {Because lets face it, I LOVE holding and loving on my Austy}

Well as I laid him down and he started to wake up...there she was in the doorway. I cant say she had blonde hair in pigtails and bright blue eyes smiling at me...but I saw SOMETHING. Just a cloud or image. Strange. My heart dropped. I always feel her around when im hurting or maybe when shes trying to tell me somthing and just wants me to know shes here. I love it.

Baby brother Austin is now 5 months old. Its crazy to think I have a living breathing ever changing baby that is 5 months old. Last year I couldnt imagine life how it is today. Taking care of a baby on a daily basis instead of caring for a grave site. Now I do both. I work, stop by to check on Bella and give kisses from mommy, daddy, and brother..and then I head home to my loves.

When Austin does something new I often think how Bella would have sounded, acted, looked like doing the same things. It makes me sad but I dont cry like I did in the beginning. Ive had a few days but theyre not nearly as often as they used to be. I have my angel to thank for giving me the strength to get thru each day with a smile on my face. I absolutely LOVE my girl and miss her more than ever.

Thats all for now...

1 comment:

  1. Oh, wow! How amazing!!! <3 I have yet to "see" Collins, but I know he is around. Sometimes I ask Manny if he sees him and he points! He sees with his eyes what I see with my heart