8.01.2010

My sweet baby Bella


Here it is August already... it's been almost 7 months since you became an angel. I cant imagine you as a 7 month old...I say that every month. Its still hard to look at babies when I feel you should be amongst them, its still not fair, nor will it ever be.

Time has passed so quick, yet it feels like an eternity since you took your last breath in our arms. I dont feel the heaviness in my arms like I used to. The smells arent fresh and I dont hear the beeping alarms except on rare occasions. I miss those things that used to make me so upset.

I miss you terribly. I miss your soft chubby cheeks and cute little nose, I miss the way you nuzzled your head on my chest, and the way you slept so peacefully in my arms right after your were born. I miss watching your toes wiggle and the way you squeezed my finger so tight right before you left. I will never forget those moments. You brought so much joy to my life and youve tought me so much in such a short time.



Oh Bella, there are some days I dont want to get out of bed, but you have given me so much strength to go on and so I keep putting one foot infront of the other until I get to be reunited with you. Everytime I think I cant, I think of you. You were such a little fighter and an inspiration and I pull my strength from your memory and the fight you put up. Its so amazing how such a tiny little baby can make such a difference.

Im soooo proud to be your mommy...and I will treasure our memories together forever <3

I think of you often, miss you, and love you even more than the day you came into our lives.

I love you baby girl.

Mom


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